twistedviper: whorusszahhak: perfectionistdia: whorusszahhak: don’t ever take me on a date to an aquarium because i will ignore you and spend the whole time looking at the fish But, if you think about it, that’s all the more reason to go. The person you’re dating gets to sit back and watch you smile and have fun. All the while, he/she’s falling deeper in love with you. thatS REALLY...
louisharrystylinson: thehemospectrum: what if our fingers were only as long as our toes
letterstogodptiii: tea-books-and-blankets: yaygocats: discomplete: “i want to wear shorts because it’s hot but i really hate my legs” an autobiography “I want to wear shorts but i didnt shave” the sequel. “I want to wear shorts but I don’t tan and I’d rather not blind you” The trilogy “I want to wear shorts but my huge dick always sticks out” a pop-up book
chinkerbelle: Reasons I grab my boobs running upstairs running downstairs running stoked on life scared walking through my house in the dark bored boobs
omgsam: “am I kicked out of the fandom yet??? xD” “our fandom is the most insane LOL!” “and yet another fandom ruins a hipster post ftww!!!” “omg if you don’t reblog this you’re kicked out of the fandom!!!” “I bet hipsters reblog this and have no idea where it’s from haha losers!!! xD”
nazicollaborator: egberts: svvitzerland: svvitzerland: What is the opposite of a restaurant? a workaurant i hope you get arrested for this joke you mean arworked
poopflow: a sex position called the gatsby where you stare longingly at your partner from a distance and scream old sport when you climax
arpakasso: bondoge: swag youre it no snapbacks
meanwhile in twitter… moments later…
bowlegsandangels: killercest: cameronjohngodfrey: azazels-child: why is sexuality such a big thing like just have sex with whoever you want as long as they consent why is it such a huge thing You should run for office. if i ran for office i would end up legalizing situational murder yeah, definitely run for office.
dicksplit: first day of kindergarten